Welcome Friends: Ahlan wa sahlan!
The subject matter of yesterday’s reading is ongoing today.
- Some of you who did the Reading in Arabic may have noticed that, in these verses, the ‘waiting-period’ of widows/divorcees to remarry was called ‘tarabbuS/تربُّص’ (literally ‘waiting’). The common term among Muslims however is ‘iddah’ “عِدّة while no one uses the word ‘tarabbuS,’ unfortunately. Studying the Qur’an helps us better understand the concept called ‘Iddah’ which has become so exaggerated in common practice that it seems to have nothing to do with Qur’anic guidance; everything related to ‘iddah’ has become subjective, different in certain cultures -sometimes even certain families- than others.[1]
- The general belief is that a widow’s ‘iddah’ (especially if she’s past the child-bearing age) is imposed ‘upon her’ to show respect for her departed husband, but that is not the case. Firstly, it is imposed upon society in general -not just upon her- perhaps to help her deal with her new circumstances without anyone hassling her, especially with regard to inheritance and remarriage. Secondly, the waiting period is not intended merely to know if the woman is pregnant, because even when she is known to be pregnant, the waiting period continues until -or discontinues as soon as- she has delivered the baby. This means that her ‘iddah’ covers the length of her pregnancy which could be nine months -or nine days- after the baby’s father had died! Therefore, it is not out of respect for the deceased husbands that the waiting period ‘iddah/tally’ was imposed upon society: It is out of respect for women’s ‘arHaam,’ in honor of their wombs and of each woman’s guardianship of this most sacred of God’s creation.[2]
Many verses speak of ‘arHaam,’ and we shall be coming across verses which show us how honored women are to be guardians of the womb.
- Some readers may have stopped and wondered at the ending of Verse 228, which speaks of divorced women ‘muTallaqaat’ who may be pregnant and their ‘bu3ool’ their husbands (who impregnated them)[3] having more right (than others) to recall them back into the marriage. But then, in that same verse is a third category: the ‘rijaal’ who have a ‘darajah’ over these pregnant divorcees.
The verse either could be talking about ‘men’ in general (not their husbands, or else it would have said ‘bu3ool’ again, or at least ‘azwaaj’).
Either that OR:
Since the plural ‘Rijaal’ in Arabic does not specify gender but rather is about pedestrians/persons in stride/active persons on their feet (and only points to ‘men’ when the context makes that clear, as in ‘rijaal’ and ‘nisaa’).. and since Rijaal is the plural formed out of any of these three words, the first two of which are feminine:
Feminine: 1. Rajlaa/رجلى…2. Rajulah/رجُلة… an active woman, on her foot/feet ‘rijl/rijleyn’
Masculine: 3. Rajul/رجُل.. an active man.. on his feet.
The plural ‘rijaal’ is the opposite of ‘rukbaan’ -riders on a mount, which appears twice in the Qur’an 2:239; 22:27.
THIS COULD MEAN SOMETHING ELSE:
This could simply mean that the rijaal women, the freely active, non-pregnant divorcees have a higher darajah[4] of freedom over those who are pregnant.
COMMENTS:
- The exact term ‘Iddah’ “عِدة”-actually appears in the Qur’an 7 times: twice with regard to the number of days one should make up for in Fasting Ramadan (HQ 2:24, 184), twice in informing us of the ‘number’ of months in a year (HQ 9:36, 37), once regarding a certain number of Custodians/angels (HQ74:31), and twice with regard to the number of months to count before a divorcee is free to remarry(HQ 33:49; 65:1).
In other words, ‘Iddah’ means ‘a tally, a number, a calculation.’[5]
- As for the terms used in yesterday’s and today’s reading, the Qur’an uses two words: ‘tarabbus’[6] literally meaning ‘to wait,’ and ‘ajal’[7] meaning end of term, both very well-explained by Muhammad Asad: (See HQ2: 228 “يتربَّصن”/ 2:231, 232: “أجلهن”/2:234: “يتربَّصن” & “أجلهن” (.
What does that indicate?
It indicates that when we use the word ‘Iddat,’ we give it a much broader connotation than the Qur’an. ‘Iddah’-‘tarabbus’-‘ajal’ mean quite simply, keeping tally of the exact number of days/months a widow or divorcee should wait before she can remarry (or be spoken for). The number is 4 months & ten days for a widow, 3 menstrual cycles (if she menstruates) or else 3 months for a divorcee, and childbirth for a pregnant widow or divorcee (who could arrive at the end of her term within hours or in nine months).
The Qur’an does not elaborate further on this matter, and much of what widows or divorcees ‘should or shouldn’t do’ has been relegated to Tradition.
Nevertheless, it would be sound advice for us, men and women, to rise to the higher standards of a fair-minded, God-conscious community, one which ultimately upholds the honor and dignity of all its members.
- Some of you who did the Reading in Arabic may also have noticed that these verses are in large part addressed to authoritative figures who can help with divorce OR reconciliation, whether parents of the estranged couple, or members of the community who hold the couple’s best interest at heart, or even judges who might enforce rulings.
It would be wise for everyone to note the warning at the center of Verse 231:
“…… and do not treat God’s Signs as a jest” (Ali) “…do not treat these messages of God in a frivolous spirit” (Asad).
This is a very serious warning, pertaining first and foremost to these verses, and encompassing all of God’s ayaat. Mentioned 5 times in the Qur’an, taking God’s verses lightly is a sign of Denial/Kufr, with grievous consequences for any who do so.
As we noted, these verses are not all addressed to husbands. This is more apparent in Yusuf Ali’s translation of these verses than in Muhammad Asad’s because at least Ali puts what he understands between brackets (‘your wives’ in this instance). This is helpful since the Qur’an spoke in general terms and did NOT, in fact, say ‘your wives’ here, or limit the address to husbands. Despite that, we find in Muhammad Asad’s translation of 229:
“…And it is not lawful for you to take back anything of what you have ever given your wives unless both (partners) have cause to fear that they may not be able to keep within the bounds set by God…”
Some might ask: What’s so important about such small inaccuracies?
The answer is that every word in the Qur’an is important because inaccuracy results in the misapplication of instruction, which could lead to grave wrongdoing in God’s name. We draw attention to this issue here only as an example; NOT seeking to detract from our commentators’ and translators’ admirable work, but to highlight the fact that we are all human and will, indeed, make mistakes. It is OUR human mistakes which have reflected negatively upon our wonderful Faith, but with the Qur’an, in its original Arabic, we can make amends. It is, after all, our ultimate source of Guidance.
- Verse 233 deals with mothers nursing their babies after divorce, and states that suckling may continue up to the complete two-year term, with full paternal support. It is interesting to note here that suckling the baby is not a mother’s ‘duty.’[8] There are Fatwas that detail how to go about this (that she should give the baby the colostrum, and then it’s up to her, unless the baby doesn’t take to other ‘nursing-mothers/methods’ in which case she must continue). We recall here that the Prophet ﷺ upon birth was nursed by Sa’diyyah.
and Here we read this beautiful Qur’anic principle for the first time:
“….No soul shall have a burden laid on it greater than it can bear…” (Y.Ali).
This principle will be explained more fully when it appears again at the very end of this Chapter, but for now, because the word ‘kallafa’ means ‘to charge,’ let us read it more accurately thus:
“….. No Self is charged beyond its capacity ….”
- Muhammad Asad shows us in Verse 234 that it is the community who is addressed, and not the husbands alone, and he quotes Zamakhshari in note 222.
- The last verse in today’s reading calls for generosity and Awareness between divorcing couples, as well as a call to act with grace towards each other, for God sees all.
Here we note the statement “وأن تعفو أقرب للتقوى“ about one side overlooking/forgiving the other their rightful share of the dower (the case here being unconsummated marriage, where the woman can keep half and return the other half).
Forgoing one’s rightful share is ‘closest to Awareness.’ Unfortunately, we rarely speak about ‘awareness’ and what is ‘closest to it’ in our general discourse, but we should.
Enough said!
Tomorrow’s reading is from verse 238-248.
Peace unto all!
[1] It is tragic today that ‘Islamic/Sharia’ laws are read in a way that tilts so much in favor of males over females that the latter constantly feel wronged, the word ‘Sharia’ -as viewed in many countries- having become a double-edged sword that cuts through their rights, no matter on which side of it they stood.
[2] This reminds us of HQ 4:1.
[3] The word ‘bu3ool,’ plural of “ba’l” here very eloquently expresses ‘fertility;’ the Qur’an mentions this word whenever speaking of a sexually-active husband. The word was understood as such understood by the Arabs, especially Qureish who had the idol ‘Ba’l’ (which since ancient Canaanite times was god of life and fertility). The linguistic definition speaks of playing with one’s ‘ahl’ (usually meaning wife), of rain, and of land.
[4] ‘Darajah’ in Arabic, commonly understood as ‘degree/ rank’ is actually about ‘proceeding,’ as in to tread in any direction. Having a ‘darajah’ above others means that one has proceeded and taken a ‘step/ tread’ more than they have. Q 4:95 shows us that people who exert themselves in God’s way -financially and personally -seeking no material return- proceed to a step above those who are motionless/ stationary. They have ‘earned’ the higher ‘step.’
درج: يدلُّ على مُضِيِّ الشّيءِ والمُضيِّ في الشّيء. من ذلك قولُهم دَرَجَ الشّيءُ، إذا مَضَى لسبيله. ورجَع فُلانٌ أدراجَه، إذا رَجع في الطّريق الذي جاء منه. ودَرَج الصَّبيُّ، إذا مَشَى مِشْيته
[5] عد: العَدّ: إحصاء الشيء. تقول: عددت الشيءَ أعُدُّه عَدّاً فأنا عادٌّ، والشيء معدود. ومن الباب العِدَّة من العَدّ.
[6] ربص: أصلٌ واحدٌ يدلُّ على الانتظار. من ذلك التربُّص.
[7] الأَجَل: غاية الوقت في مَحَلِّ الدَّين وغيره… والاسم الآجِل نقيض العاجل والأجيل المُرْجأ، أي المؤخَّر إلى وقتٍ.
[8] Muslim women might be interested to know that -according to ‘Islam’- housekeeping and cooking etc. are not part of their duties; husbands should help as was customary during the time of revelation. If husbands can afford it, they should hire domestic help. See here.